Sextacular®
Coaching for Couples
Explore new dimensions of connection and pleasure in a journey tailored to your needs.
Learn transformative tools to heal relationship issues, communicate effectively, foster deep connection and reignite sex.
Transform your relationship today and embrace the connection and passion you deserve!
Common Issues for Couples
- Feel disconnected, lack of emotional intimacy, passionless, or roommate relationship
- Sexless relationship, sexual issues, low libido, lack of desire and/or not having the sexual connection you desire
- Commitment or trust issues, infidelity or emotional affairs
- Unresolved conflict, arguments, communication challenges
- Feeling of “walking on eggshells”, criticism, control, blame or contempt
- Repetitive upsets, habits, behaviors that negatively impact the relationships
- Unresolved traumas, dysfunctional relationship patterns
- Substance abuse, addictive behaviors (porn, social media, alcohol, gambling, etc.)
Why Couples Coach
My couples coaching method is a unique, specialized process that isn’t for the faint. Couples typically arrive feeling helpless and hopeless despite years of therapy, multiple therapists and thousands of dollars trying. Most do not want to end their relationships but have exhausted themselves mentally, emotionally, sexually, energetically and even financially trying… they just need relief and solutions. “Nothing works…” Until now.
Couples learn to communicate effectively, improve emotional understanding, resolve conflict, heal inner wounds, relationship wounds and create healthy habits. While couples do part ways, others don’t and everyone learns new personal and relationship patterns to grow and achieve goals.
As the experienced coach and fiduciary of the relationship, I help couples understand the unhealthy dynamics and patterns not working in the relationship. This requires addressing individual patterns as well as couple patterns and habits. This is why I work with each person for several sessions before the real couple works begins. This makes sessions more effective and doable for everyone as each partner understands themselves more and what they need. Together, with my guidance, couples begin to navigate resolving issues, communicating needs and recreating relationship.
Couples will find I relate equally to men and women, but also take sides in relational stances when necessary. I delve into sexuality issues and concerns, identifying emotional and physical intimacy issues and solutions to resolve. I coach relationally sharing experiences from others and myself – some thing that isn’t common in traditional therapy.
Results Couples Get
- Learn healthy, effective communication skills to confidently express needs more openly and honestly
- Improved conflict resolution and strategies to resolve disagreements constructively, reduce tension & healthy talks
- Stronger emotional connections to deepen bond, foster intimacy, trust and understanding each other’s perspectives
- Understanding each others values, beliefs and attachment styles for greater empathy and patience
- Heal personal and relationship traumas (infidelity, abuse, addictions, etc.)
- Identify and rewire sabotaging habits and patterns with new patterns that foster a healthy, thriving relationship
- Realign the trust, integrity and authenticity with yourself and within the relationship to reinforce commitment
- Explore sexuality, openly discuss sexual needs, desire and deeper intimacy for a more fulfilling sex life
- Create healthy boundaries, mutual respect and reduce feelings of resentment
- Others consciously uncouple, ending relationship mutually with confidence and without regret
- Unexpected results include – restoring relationships with family members, conscious parenting, financial gains, career opportunities, improved health and creating a life you love!
How I Coach Couples
All coaching begins with inner child, family of origin and trauma work. This is the root of our protective personality, i.e. EGO. In the first 1-3 sessions wounded egos and traumas are identified, named and a road map of self and personality is created. This is what I call your ego template. Then major traumas or “potholes” on your map are healed which provides a sense of relief. With a life long road map you are better able to navigate Self, relationships and life. You learn to pave smooth “roads” with healthy behaviors and bypass bumpy unhealthy ones. It’s the foundational work from which you develop a witness muscle, mindfulness tools, practices, and communication skills, etc. While you revisit the past, it’s minimal and the focus is on now and the future you desire. Together we create a happier, healthier version of you in future you love.
In couples work, I typically see the couple once together and then work with each partner alone for 1-3 sessions, sometimes more. Experience has shown me the most effective couple work happens when each partner has a better grip on themselves. It prevents couple sessions that feel one sided, ganged up on, bringing every complaint under the kitchen sink and arguing. These ineffective sessions send couples home feeling raw, hurt and with unresolved issues. Instead, we build a rapport and you begin to identify what isn’t working, where you are responsible and what you need. When the time is right I invite couples to start doing sessions together. With knew knowledge, confidence and coaching support partners begin to navigate the relationship and getting their needs met. It’s a calmer, healthier and more doable approach that works!
I use a dynamic approach to couples coaching and bring skills and theories from many relationship experts including the Gottman’s, Dr. Sue Johnson, EFT Emotionally Focused Therapy models, Terrance Real’s Relational Life Model, Pia Mellody’s Co Dependency model, Internal Family Systems model a variety of attachment and communication models plus my own model for working with couples. While not therapy or diagnostic, my coaching brings aspects, theories, skills and tools from all experts so you get a solutions catered just for you.
Clients describe me as a much needed “velvet-hammer.” Even though it’s not always easy, they appreciate my non-judgmental, authentic and very direct approach because it’s rooted in love and compassion. I believe we are the co-creators of our reality with total control of ourselves and our experiences. This includes being involved with others – spouses, partners, children, family, friends even when others don’t change.
It only takes one person to be the change. When clients take on “I am the one.” and “It stops with me” they can positively impact any relationship. When we change ourselves we can shift everything around us. My job is to help you identify, heal and transform behaviors that are not serving you or allowing the life you desire. When you stop looking at others and own it all – everything shifts providing a healing empowerment you never forget. I’ll take you as far as you want to go which can include a high caliber of self mastery and self actualization.
Keep in mind it doesn’t matter whether you’ve had therapy before, or no therapy at all. Coaching works for anyone willing.
Please note I am NOT a therapist. As a Ph.D. Health Educator and Relationship & Sexual Wellness coach I specialize in behavior change and education. I have the freedom to use ALL types of research based tools, methods and practices as well as non traditional methods – intuition, channeling, astrology, Human Design, Matrix Re Imprinting, EFT, QHHT hypnotherapy, yoga, yoga Nidra, plant medicine and more to help you achieve results.
If you are looking for diagnostic help or medication, please seek services from a therapist, psychologist, or psychiatric professional.
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Dr. Lori
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